HIGHLIGHTS

• Talking to children about pending divorce
• Dealing with guilt feelings and avoiding blame
• Considering mediation vs. litigation
• Dealing with children’s postseparation problems
• Description of children’s family and extended relationships

The Parents Book About Divorce, first published in 1977, was written to serve as a companion volume to Dr. Gardner’s classic, The Boys and Girls Book About Divorce. Like its predecessor, it has enjoyed widespread popularity. However, so many changes have taken place in the divorce realm since the book’s publication that an update was warranted. The revised edition deals in depth with many recent developments, e.g., mediation, joint and other custodial arrangements, the homosexual parent, the parental alienation syndrome, and sex-abuse accusations in the context of child custody disputes. However, much of the original material has been retained, but updated as warranted, e.g., telling the children, dealing with the child’s guilt and shame, visitation problems, reconciliation preoccupations, acting out anger, self-esteem problems, and depression.

Throughout, the advice is practical and realistic. Parents are provided with the exact reasons for the recommendations Gardner makes and he describes in detail how they may be implemented. Vignettes, drawn from the author’s vast experience treating divorced parents and their children, enhance further the richness of his discussions. Confusing psychiatric jargon is avoided, resulting in a text that is lucid in its clarity.

With its positive approach and comprehensive treatment of the complex issues involved, The Parents Book About Divorce is an indispensable guide for parents who want to make this important transition as easy as possible for their children. Therapists also will find this book a valuable guideline for their work with separated and divorced parents.